Thursday, April 17, 2008

Tomboys of the World - UNITE!

My good friend Josh, over at Booyah Achieved, posted a blog about some of of his pet peeves. One being about girls who say they get along better with boys, which received a kudos response. I felt the need to respond for all those gals who genuinely do feel that they get along better with the fellas. For I, Teresa, am one of those girls. Let's get some background.

I grew up with two brothers, one who is 18 months younger than me, and he was my best friend. And although I loved to play with my barbie dolls, it was much more fun to play matchbox cars with my brother. I had a few girlfriends in the apartment complex we lived in, but my brother and I were inseparable and we played army men and GI Joe with the best of them!

Moving onto elementary and middle school, I was so dang small, I was a magnet for bullies. The people that bullied me the most... girls. They were so mean to me and the people that came to my defense... boys. The girls on my block were so cruel, to me and to each other. They gossiped about each other, talked behind each other's back, would give one another a best friend's necklace and then take it back and give it to someone else. It was brutal! And I hated it. I gravitated to the guys on my block who were riding go-carts down the street, playing hide-and-go seek at midnight and ghost in the graveyard. The other girls would just hang out with the boys to try to make-out with them. This annoyed me a great deal. They were distracting from all the fun that was going on! Which made them bully me even more. My middle school years were awful. Except for the guy friends I had. They were great and I will always remember them fondly.

By highschool, my penchant for hanging with the boyz was set. Girls were catty and gossipy and were more apt to stab you in the back than my guy friends who were too busy playing computer games to care about talking about me behind my back. The few girls I hung out with were ladies just like me. We were a few gals in a large group of guys. I rarely ever wore makeup, I hated going clothes shopping and more than likely transformed my brothers' clothes into stuff I could wear. I ran with the boyz and generally got into the same kind of trouble that they did. Of course, this had its pros and cons. But for once in my life, I had friends that I could rely on and trust. And I loved it.

As I've gotten older, this has tempered off more. The women I have in my life aren't like the girls I knew in highschool. Maturity does a wonderful thing, on both sides. I finally see the need to have women to confide in, for things that men just don't understand. But my trust factor towards females is small from the real hurt I faced in my childhood. To this day, I choose my female friends very carefully, especially the ones I choose to have in my confidence. I am grateful for each woman that God has placed in my life. And I still keep in touch with those girlfriends that ran with the boyz along side me.

Also, my husband loves my tomboy side. He appreciates my simplicity of life. I still don't like clothes shopping so I never rack up credit card bills. I go to all sorts of sports events with him and even watch with him at home. However, I do put a little more effort into my hair and makeup. There are those girly things I do regret I didn't catch onto sooner.

That's me, a tomboy.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

Amen, Sister! (says one of the girls that hung out with the boys right along with you :)

Anonymous said...

Chick who love sports RULE - especially my chick

JudiFree.com said...

I was always in sports too (even boys baseball), you aren't the type of girl that Josh was complaining about though. See you tomorrow!

Teresa said...

i see the need to be well-rounded more than in my school days. a girl that hang with the guyz during sporting events, but bear her heart to the her girlz. that is muy importante!

Anonymous said...

My mom was a lot like you, she had 3 brothers and spent her entire childhood playing baseball and working around their family farm. She turned out to be one of the classiest, kindest and feminine women around.

Judi is right, I wasn’t referring to these types of situations. You rock, T!

Teresa said...

aw shucks!

i pray that my son feels the way about me that you do about your mom. what a blessing that wld be!

Anonymous said...

We should've been friends growing up. We could've teamed up and kicked those bully girls punks butts (although I was mighty scrawny back then). Then we could've moved on to sit in the bleachers at a football game and laugh at cheerleaders. I think I just went to far with my comment...

Anonymous said...

Teresa, you have an amazing post here. However, from your writing and just from knowing you in RL, you are nothing like the kinds of girls that Joshie Poo and I are used to hearing the "I don't get along with girls..." line from. Like you said, you were actually a lady, and I can imagine that you weren't terribly flirty with your guy friends, you weren't aggravated by a lack of attention, and you probably maintained a very respectful physical distance and were lady-like in your body language and the way you interacted physically with your guy friends. The girls I'm used to hearing "the line" from are flirty, thrive on attention, can't stand not being the center, and seem to have no qualms about being all-up-in a guys physical space; they're "touchy" when they laugh at jokes, they sit close up during movies and junk, they put out "vibes" and then act like it's no big deal. That's the kind of girl I can't stand.